Never Just Plain Sailing

I have always used this blog as a place to poke fun at myself and air some of the weird and wonderful things we encounter through nephrotic syndrome. Today isn't such a jokey one- today is a look how rubbish I feel because of steroids and I want to moan about it blog.

Since my recent stint on slightly higher steroids started last month I really felt like I was handling things well, well maybe I still am, but since abit of a rubbishy hospital trip that failed to tell me anything really with a consultant that seemed as confused as me and said my levels were 'kinda almost back too normal' which was really helpful i've been on bit of a downer. I try and keep a positive attitude but honestly after three years of brave facing it you just need a cry, a hug and to actually let it all out and I think today is that day.

If you've read my other blogs you'll know that steroids tend to effect me in the anxiety department but this time I've had a touch of the rage as well! not to mention the hunger is back, I honestly hate it I just want to eat the entire contents of the fridge, but then if I did i'd then cry because of feeling fat and guilty, but if i didn't i would cry because I was hungry! Honestly for a 20 year old girl there is a lot of crying going down at the moment and a lot of napping, pretty sure I'm regressing back to being a toddler.

I've read a lot online and on the support sites about kids struggling with the mental side of steroids and I couldn't feel more sorry for them, I mean some days I cant hold it together and I'm supposed to be an adult (well sort of) so I can see how it must be hard if you don't get the right support at school, schools hard enough without having to fight all these horrible side effects that arnt even really you (it really is lie having an alter ego!) So I have so much respect for everyone that deals with this everyday!